Too Much Candy?

I remember trick or treating as a child.  Halloween was my FAVORITE holiday.  My parents didn't spend a lot of money on going out to eat or treats like candy when I was a child.  Or at least my memory of my childhood did not involve getting candy at the grocery check out or weekly runs to McDonalds.  The consequence of this was that I REALLY appreciated getting those occasional treats.  I also LOVED Halloween because, to me, it was a free-for-all!  I loved dressing up and being someone different.  As a very shy child I loved being able to pretend like I was someone else and ask complete strangers for candy.

I remember coming home and sorting through our loot.  My sister, brother & I would section off our part of the living room floor and then categorize our candy.

Being a working mom I have to find time in my day to make the candy run before Halloween. I definitely can't make this run with kids in tow as that would be a recipe for disaster!  I don't like to go too soon because then I'm tempted to eat some of the loot before the big night.  I don't want to go too late either because then I'm left with bubble gum & pixie sticks as choices.  Unfortunately this week has been too hectic so I had to go today, Halloween Eve, during my lunch break.  (see previous blog entry on lunch breaks)

Note to self:  Do NOT go buy Halloween candy BEFORE eating lunch.  Let's say my eyeballs were a bit too big for my pocket book.

Relationships

As a working mother one of my toughest challenges is managing relationships.

Relationships with my husband is at the top of my list.  I am in the school of thought that if mommy & daddy aren't healthy & well the family unit isn't healthy & well.  So we spend a great deal of time working on our relationship.  Granted it's not such a hard job seeing as how my husband is my bestest friend in the whole wide world.  I love him to the depths of my soul.

Relationships with my children are right there at the top as well.  I try my best to devote individual time to each of them as much as I can.  I also encourage my husband to take as much one on one time with each of them as he can.  Just this past week my husband took our oldest daughter on a daddy date.  The original plan was for us to go on this date, but after no success in finding a sitter he decided it was best to take her.  She was so excited and have an amazing time!  He is going to take the other daughter out this weekend on a daddy date too...so I feel we do a pretty good job at fostering a relationship with our children.

Next on my list is my relationship with my family.  I work really hard to communicate as best I can with all of them.  I have a very special relationship with my sister.  I truly feel she is the ONLY person in the world I can tell everything to.  I'd love to be able to say that about my mother, but she is always the devil's advocate and doesn't always let me just vent or try to help me fix things.  She's very passive.  My relationship with my father isn't the greatest.  I have a lot of childhood memories that aren't so fond of my dad.  I do long for a relationship with him like my girls have and hope to have with my husband.  But we take what we are handed.  My brother and I have a strange relationship.  He is busy providing for his family while his wife stays home with their children.  He is stressed, every time I see him I long to help him.  I feel like he is a lost boy.  I am proud of the man he has become but I miss the boy he once was.  We do not talk as much as I would like, but I know one day we will have a closer relationship...at least I hope.

The most difficult of my relationships to maintain and manage are my friendships.  I am not the best at keeping up with people on a daily basis.  Life is busy so my friends unfortunately take the back seat.  I don't like to talk on the phone...at all.  So most of my communication with friends is done via text or social media.  We live in a small town and as much as I'd like to go out and hang out with friends regularly, I don't share a whole lot in common with most moms in this area my age.  I have a handful of friends that I talk to on a monthly basis, and one or two that I talk to weekly.
Why are these the hardest relationships for me?
The idea of going out for a drink after work doesn't appeal to me, I miss my kids.
The idea of going on a "girls weekend" away sounds pretty luxurious, but I would miss my kids.
The idea of going to get a pedicure and lunch on a Saturday sounds great, but I would miss time spent with my kids.

My time is precious so it's very difficult for me to devote any time to anyone other than my family.  With only evenings and weekends to use I have a hard time trusting anyone with those precious hours.  When we first moved to NC I was really excited to have some friends and be able to have a social life again.  In the 6 years since we've moved here I have realized that some relationships just aren't worth the energy.  Some relationships only add drama to my life.  So friendship take the back seat.

I see photos on social media of ladies who do girls' nights out, and I've been to my fair share of those.  I've seen photos of GROUPS of girlfriends doing weekends away or various different things.  Even groups of girlfriends going out WITH their children to do fun outings.  I don't fit into that idea.  I've never had a large group of girlfriends, I don't foresee ever being a part of a large group of girlfriends.  I'm more apt to have one or two really close friends than a GROUP of girlfriends.  This concept of groups doing things together fascinates me.  When I feel insecure about the fact I'm not invited to group outings or girl's weekends away I remind myself that perception is everything.  We don't know from a photo the depth of a relationship.  I would prefer to have a few really close relationships with people I can count on than a ton of "friends" that I barely can trust.  Now I'm not saying these groups of women can't trust one another, it's just my way of coping with the idea that I'm not fit for that type of friend-setting.

I find the friendships that have lasted through the years are those that understand my hectic life.  The friends who also have a hectic life and understand my daily struggles.  Friendships where we can go long periods of time without talking and still pick up right where we left off.  ...then again, I may have just defined what a TRUE friend is.  SO that is half the battle...determining WHO is WORTH your time and a TRUE BLUE friend.

My most important relationship of all is with my God.  I wish I were better about maintaining this relationship.  We don't attend church regularly, I don't pray and talk with Him as often as I should.  I do know He is always there.  He is the reason I have been so blessed and my goal is to work hardest on my relationship with Him.

What relationships are the most difficult for you?  What do you do to strengthen your most important relationship?

My Oldest Child - ADHD

My oldest child is diagnosed with ADHD, ODD & Generalized Anxiety.

My oldest child is my biggest challenge.

My oldest child is so very special to me.

My oldest child is kind.

My oldest child is beautiful.

My oldest child is amazing.

My oldest child is intelligent.

My oldest child is a blessing.

My oldest child teaches me daily what it means to have patience.

My oldest child teaches me how to be a better mom.

My oldest child teaches me that we are all different, yet universally the same.

My oldest child teaches me that what works for one doesn't work for all.

My oldest child loves me.

My oldest child adores me.

My oldest child wants me to be proud of her.

My oldest child needs me.

My oldest child's diagnosis does not define her.

My oldest child's diagnosis does not define me.

My oldest child's diagnosis is just a diagnosis.



These are the things I try to remember when I get frustrated with my oldest child.
Every day I learn something new about her and her diagnosis.
Everyday I learn something new about myself and how I parent.

Lunch Breaks

Most everywhere you work you are given a lunch break.  Being salaried, I get a "break" of about an hour.  Sometimes I don't take the break at all; either because I'm too busy and forget/can't OR I skip it so that I can leave early to be with the kids.

Many days the lunch break is essential to survival as a working mom.  These breaks can be used for many things that doesn't necessarily include eating.  Here are a few things I've been known to do on my "lunch break":
-2 loads of laundry
-weed the garden
-clean up from dinner the night before
-run to the bank/post office/accountant/lawyer, etc...to take care of family business
-attend a business meeting
-shop to Christmas
-shop for birthdays
-shop for Halloween
-shop for _________
-pick up groceries
...and most recently...shampoo a room in our house...yeah I just did that today.

Some of the more fun things I have done on my "lunch break" include:
-get a massage (I've only done this once but I'm listing it first because it's my favorite and I really need to do it again)
-go for a run
-have lunch with the girls at school (definitely a favorite)
-have lunch with a friend
-get a haircut
-get a pedicure
-have "happy time" with husband :) (OK I take it back, THAT one is my favorite)

Working full time outside the home affords me a bit of flexibility in my life.  Where I'd be home and committed to the children 24/7 if I stayed home, I am otherwise able to do more during that ONE HOUR than I could ever accomplish with 3 children under my feet.  Granted, I can't do laundry while AT work, or run the vacuum while Liam is napping and the girls are at school.  I also can't get homework started right after school or prepare for the next day while the kids are still wide awake and not so grumpy.  The fun things I get to do on occasion contribute a large part to why I enjoy working outside the home.  It is really important to me to have the time to grow friendships and have time to myself; even if that time isn't ENTIRELY all my time.

The days I don't take a lunch break are some of the most rewarding.  Those days I can sometimes pick the girls up from school and go get ice cream before we have to pick Liam up.  Some of those days I can pick all the kids up and head to the park before time to start working on dinner.  Those are great days!

....now excuse me while I go book a massage for 11:30am tomorrow.

Helping

At what point does helping your child, hinder them?

Ava has a book report due this week.  She has to make a foam pumpkin into a character from her book.  She will also dress as the character with pumpkin in hand and parade across the stage at school.  She chose a book about a bunny.

I took her to the craft store and we spent $11.36 on a foam pumpkin and a few supplies for her to begin her project.  I instructed her to lay out a towel on the floor in our freshly shampooed living room floor and make her pumpkin into a bunny.  I didn't offer any suggestions on how EXCEPT to perhaps paint it white first.  So she painted it white.  She was SO anxious for it to dry, and when it did she began creating her bunny.  She decided this bunny needed to be a princess.  (Obviously!  A plain white bunny is SO boring!)  She pasted gems, hearts, & flowers on her.  She made the mouth out of a flower so it looks like it is kissing. She asked for my help on the whiskers, so I obliged, but was sure to make them just as I thought she would.  She loved them.  Then it came down to the ears.  The ears are perhaps the most important part of the bunny, because it makes you understand what the animal is.  I could have pulled out a bunny headband she had in her dress up chest upstairs and hot glue it on for her.  I could have constructed something life-like for her to attach.  I did none of those things.  I let her create them on her own, using the supplies she had and her imagination.  She took her favorite ribbon, a blue, pink & black high school musical ribbon, and cut and folded it perfectly.  She then glued the ears on.  She did an amazing job and requested no help from me.  She was so proud.  I AM SO PROUD OF HER!  I will cherish this pumpkin.

Later that night while perusing social media, a friend of mine posted a photo of her son's pumpkin.  It was a lion.  The most realistic looking lion pumpkin I have ever seen.  I am still trying to figure out HOW she (he) did it.  My best guess is they gutted the head of a stuffed animal and slipped it on top of the pumpkin.  I have NO idea how they did it.  It's gorgeous.  BUT it's not his work.  I was snarky and said something about "wow, Ava might get an F if that is her competition" she responded saying that "he did all the work, I just helped with the concept"  YEAH FREAKING RIGHT.  I refrain from posting a photo of the lion pumpkin...but just imagine a realistic lion, and that's it.

At what point does helping your child hinder them?

I sat down and talked with Ava after seeing this.  I told her how gorgeous her pumpkin turned out and how proud of her I was that she did it all on her own.  I told her that she will likely see some pretty fancy pumpkins this week but to remember that she did her's on her own and that many kid's parents may like to take over projects and HELP them a bit more than they should.  I told her over and over how beautiful and perfect her pumpkin is.  I will save this pumpkin forever.

Parents, let's think about what we are doing when we "Help" our children.  What are they learning if you are doing everything for them?  What are they learning if you dictate HOW to use their imagination?  What are they learning if when they get frustrated you simply take over?

My hope is that Ava's teacher encourages her when she sees her pumpkin.  My hope is that she also encourages the child who did not do their own work.  I hope that she encourages him to stand up for himself and insist he do it on his own next time.  I hope that he gains the independence Ava did on this simple project.

Car Riders

Balancing work & kids...a constant struggle.

Many people are curious as to how we manage 3 kids and 2 jobs.

Our girls are enjoying their last year at the same elementary school, which means next year will be more complicated...but I don't even want to think about that right now.  Many days are day to day.  I've learned to worry about today and plan for tomorrow and try to enjoy what we have now as much as possible.  "Live in the moment"  BUT there are moments that are just so difficult.

Today I had one of those moments.

So here is what our routine looks like:

Girls leave for school with daddy at 7:15/20 (tardy bell rings at 7:30)
Mommy takes Liam to school then heads to work around this time, arriving at work by 8am.

Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday Daddy picks the girls up from school and they come with him back to work.  This isn't ideal.  We have had sitters/tutors/nannies for the girls in the afternoon but it's expensive and they aren't doing their homework...so it's kind of been a bust. After-school at the school is terrible...I'll save that for another post someday.  I do look forward to the day they are old enough to be latch key...but that gives me anxiety.

We have found this routine to be a good solution, FOR NOW.  On Mondays & Wednesdays I pick them up from the soccer field at 5pm then head to get Liam by 5:30 (when daycare closes)  I hate that he is there for 10 hours a day but it is what it is.  We go home and do dinner, baths, homework & bed.  Daddy gets home around 8:30/9pm.

Tuesdays have become known as "Taxi Tuesday"; here's why:

Daddy picks girls up at 2:30, goes back to his office.  I drive to pick them up at 4:15, drop Jade off at choir practice by 4:30; then shuttle Ava across town to soccer practice by 5, throw her out the door, go get Liam which is another 10 minutes down the road, rush back to pick Jade up by 5:30 and then BACK to the choir practice to pick up Ava by 6.  WHEW! Then we go home and it's dinner time at 6:30, homework (because usually daddy can't get them to do it all) baths then bed by 8:30.  That is the craziest day of the week.  It is also the reason  we do not allow the girls to do more than one activity after school right now.  I just can't handle it.

We justify the girls going to Ted's work in the afternoon 3 days a week because he works more than 12 hour days those days.  Luckily he is in charge and it doesn't really bother anyone....today.

On Thursdays the girls go with a group of kids after school to the church next door for homework, singing & bible study activities.  This is their only religious experience for the week (Church on Sundays will be a whole other post) and for that I am thankful.

Fridays are my days, a compromise for Ted doing so much picking up throughout the week.

Problem with Fridays are that they are very unpredictable for me.  Most of my business comes from people who walk in and get information, I had two of these today while I was out picking up the girls.  Usually I can bring them back here and they can entertain themselves and they're pretty well behaved, running around in the yard outside, helping the front desk, etc.  BUT today Jade had a meltdown and wouldn't settle.  It was a tough decision on what to do.

My choice were:
a) force her to chill out and go to my office (NO)
b) take them to daddy or
c) go home.
C is not really an option right now as things at work are kind of weird and I had to meet with two different groups of people...talk about a recipe for disaster!  SO I called Ted and he told me to bring them to him.

Mommy guilt kicks in on days like today.  When I know her entire meltdown could be fixed with a trip to get ice cream after school and then cuddles on the couch.  But so many times I have to choose work.

Today sucked.

Myths

I'm trying to liven up my posts with photos.  I'll be working on this going forward.

In my research of looking for "working mom" photos...yes I googled "Working Mom"...there are a TON of blogs about the subject.

I do hope that I offer a different angle...but in the event that I don't that is OK too.  This is just as much an outlet for me and not necessarily meant to "educate" anyone...but really just be something others can empathize with.

So in my research I ran across this little gem:

http://www.babble.com/toddler/11-myths-about-mothers-who-work-outside-of-the-home/

I actually really resonated with these "myths"

My favorite are that working moms are miserable, we are spoiled, and we aren't nurturers.

It is so very interesting the ideas people come up with to justify their choice and belittle our choice.

Enjoy! (And LOOK I ripped off their photo....so creds to the babble article above on this pic!)

Breastfeeding A Toddler

For 17 months I have breastfeed Liam.

For 15 months I have managed night feedings and sleep/lack of sleep and then getting up for a full day of work.

Last night sucked.

Liam has 4 new teeth coming in and it hurts like hell!  Imagine tiny little razor blades scraping your nipples over and over again combined with suction.  Yeah....it hurts.

I'm so torn.  I want to give him the nourishment his little toddler body needs.  Especially as he is so selective lately on what he will actually eat from the table.  I want to give him the comfort he is craving while dealing with 4 new teeth cutting through his soft gums.  Can you imagine how awful that must feel?

Last night he cried for almost an hour as I sat next to him and defended myself from his clawing and grabbing to nurse.  I just couldn't let him nurse.  I hurt and I was selfish.

Ted went back into work right after bedtime and came home around midnight after my cry for help with Liam.  It was an awful night.  Ted took Liam to another room and told me to get some sleep, have I mentioned how much of a saint my husband is?

Liam was fine.  He whined a bit here and there, surely from the discomfort of his teeth, but daddy was there to comfort him.

I feel like I gave up.  I feel like I let him down.

Homework

Homework. 

The dreaded evening obstacle. The one thing between a busy work day and a cozy peaceful evening (well as peaceful as this house gets). 

Children are in school for 7 hours a day. So we can assume about 2 hours is used up on transitions, lunch, snak, specials like art...but that leaves 5 hours. Why in the world can our children not learn everything they need to learn in 5 hours each day?  I won't open up this for debate about curriculum, time management, or anything directed at our totally screwed up system.  My point is this...our kids need time to be kids. I know we had homework growing up but I don't remember it being so consuming until at least high school. Why am I sometimes spending 4 hours with my 5th grader on math?

Homework is unnecessary busy work. 

Projects on occasion. Yes. Valuable. 

Extra work for subjects that a child needs extra help with?  Yes. Valuable. 

Everything else is wasted family time for kids to unwind and enjoy their week. 

I'm so ready to win the lottery. Homeschooling is more attractive everyday.  

Is it worth it?

Such a loaded question.

Is it worth it to work outside the home full time?

This question is so specific to each individual that answers it.  My answer will be different than some, but I think universally the same.

Yes.

Yes it is VERY much worth it for me to work full time outside the home.  Is it my ideal life?  Maybe not.  My ideal life would be sitting on a beach with my children without a care in the world...no school, no work, no responsibilities.  Our life would be about having fun and enjoying our company together.  That is my heaven, and unless I win the loto tomorrow, not my reality.  Reality in most people's lives involves work in some way to provide for a family.  Our society has shifted into a duel-income society.  It is VERY difficult to have only one working parent.

As a child, I always knew I would work.  My mom stayed home with us until my brother started kindergarten, then she went to work at our elementary school.  I admired my mom's dedication to us and making sure she was home when we were.  I also feared it.  I feared that my mom didn't have the income she would need to support herself and us kids on her own.  If she ever chose to do so or was forced to do so she would have struggled.  I do not know the day, time or moment when I decided I would be a working mom.  It kind of just happened upon me.  I knew I wanted to get my education, so I went to college...and graduated.  I knew I wanted to be married and have children but did not know what would happen after.  I wasn't a great planner.

After I had Jade, I automatically went back to work at 6 weeks postpartum.  There wasn't much discussion between Todd and I about the option to stay home.  We found an in home daycare option for $90/week.  I made more than $90/week so it made sense for me to work, as in doing so I would also get health insurance for us.  So off I went.  And that was the ground work for where we are now.

After Ava was born I was blessed to work with the owner of a company and able to bring Ava with me to work while Jade went to preschool (she was 3.5) so the expense of 2 in daycare wasn't a concern right way.  My income had also increased to allow for that daycare expense if needed.  THEN Ted decides we need to move back to NC.  (We were in VA at the time)  SO we packed up when Ava was 3 months old and moved to our now home in NC.  It took me 2 weeks to find a job earning a bit more than I did in VA with benefits.  We found a suitable daycare option for both girls and off I went.  It was a mere 6 months of two in daycare before Jade started kindergarten...so the sting was short-lived.

When we had Liam, I took as much time as I could off.  Because of the spacing between Ava & Liam we only had to worry about 1 daycare bill.  In fact, we had 3 months while I took maternity leave that we had ZERO daycare expense.

For me, my career is very important.  I also know that IF I stayed home with my children I would not be as good of a mom as I am now.  I also know that staying home will not fix the struggles of keeping a clean house, in fact it might add to those struggles.  I had all 3 of my children home full time during maternity leave and that was enough time to know that I am a much happier person working.  It's the right balance for me.

Finances you ask?  Yes it is expensive to hire a nanny or have a child in daycare.  You also have to add gas, food, etc. for being at work and not at home.  In the end the health insurance is a big piece of the puzzle.  The way I look at it is if I have health insurance and bring home $1 more than I spend each week, then it is financially worth it.

What are the costs for my children?  Less time with mom?  Yes...BUT they are learning to cooperate around different people.  They are learning independence & responsibility in a way that I would not be able to teach on my own.

And the snuggles...the afternoon/evening snuggles.  The weekends...the weekends of lounging and watching cartoons.  I enjoy those precious hours together, perhaps more because they are fewer.

It is totally worth it. (for me)

The core issue

Core Issue & Symptoms

Last week I had a coworker curse at me.  Actually, one could argue she cussed me out.  I would argue that.

After sending an informative/professional email to 4 people, she decided to reply to all and tell me whats what.  Apparently she was having a bad day.  As soon as I got her "reply to all" I picked up the phone and dialed her extension.  She proceeded to cuss me out.

I did nothing wrong.  I KNOW this.

I've struggled with this.  It has affected me at home.  I am still dwelling on it a week later.

In a meeting a this week (yesterday), my boss brought up an analogy.

He handed out a piece of paper with a flower on it.  In the center of the flower were the words "Core Issue" and the pedals were labeled "Symptoms".  He told us about a patient that had been falling in the middle of the night, and once they found out he was getting up for water and could be sure to fill his water container so he didn't have to get up, he stopped falling. (I'm paraphrasing)  He says "The core issue was his lack of water.  Once the core issue was solved the symptoms fell away"  I DISAGREE with this analogy and it took everything I had not to say something.  I am holding my tongue daily to not correct my boss.  It's SO frustrating and challenging.

The core issue may have been the need for water in the middle of the night.  The symptoms of him getting up and being upset with staff were gone after they fixed the core issue, yes, I agree.  BUT the CONSEQUENCES of the symptoms from the core issue are still there.  Consequences may be:  a broken hip/leg/shoulder from falls which now requires rehabilitation, a distrust in staff which may never be fixed, a "bad taste" for the facility as a whole, I'm sure there are more but I'll stop there, because you are smart people and get my point.

So I was told that he dealt with the "Core Issue" of the falling out between me and the coworker.  He says it's a personnel issue and he can't discuss it with me.  (WHICH I GET) Great.  Good for you.  BUT I still don't want to talk to her, much less look at her or work with her, that is a consequence of the symptom of HER core issue.

Meanwhile he is bringing her ice cream and having one on one meetings behind closed doors.

Men suck and don't understand women.

About me:

I am a mom to 3 amazing children.  My oldest daughter, age 10 (born 9/3/03) is diagnosed ADHD/ODD with generalized anxiety.  My middle child is also a girl, age 6 (born 3/22/07), and going to be "trouble" or so I've been told.  My baby boy, age 17 months (born 5/23/12) is the "game changer".  They will go by Jade(10), Ava(6) & Liam(1) on my blog from here on out.  (I will try to semi-protect them from embarrassment later...also I want to be able to talk about them and not be completely truthful 100% of the time and not be bitten in the butt for it later.)

My husband is amazing.  A saint, really.
We've been married 9 years(2004).  Yes, our oldest is a year older than we have been married.  She was our most amazing "engagement gift" to one another.  And determined not to be a "fat bride" and have my "dream wedding" we got married a year later.  Sue me.  She knows this and it doesn't bother her, contrary to what my dear husband's grandmother told me back in 2003 while trying to convince us to go to the JOP. "Don't you think she'll be embarrassed her parents weren't married when she was born"....you were wrong, Nana! (so far)
So back to my husband, he runs an athletic club(not fitness club, get it right) and works 12 hour days, almost 7 days a week.  He is in charge of bed time and school drop off for the girls each morning.  He cooks....I suck at cooking.  But I bake....lets make that clear!  He is super supportive of all of us, carries his load in house work (contrary to what I may post in rage from here on after) and is just an all around great guy.  Everyone loves him, especially dogs ... he will forever more be referred to as "Ted" in this blog.  This is to protect myself.

We live in a small-ish town in North Carolina.  My family is about 4 hours away...all. of. them.  (They live within 5 minutes of each other.)  My husband's family is mixed.  His mom lives in a very close-by town, yet we see her MAYBE once a month.  His dad and step mom live in Virginia, about 6 hours away.

Our kids are in public school & daycare.  My daily wish is to win the lottery so I can quit my career job and home school them.  The world terrifies me.

We are gentle parents.  We cosleep/bed share, breastfeed, and try to be as natural as we can whilst keeping our sanity.

At the heart of everything I am a Christian.  I love my God and He gets all the glory for the amazing life I have been blessed with.  (but I won't be preaching on my blog)

Happy reading!!

A new blog

SO......

Don't you love it when someone starts a sentence with "SO"?  Usually starting a sentence that way you are being set up for a surprise, or even worse...disappointment.

"SO....there's good news & bad news"  "SO....we're pregnant"  "SO...I wrote in permanent marker on the dry erase board...oops"  "SO...there's pee on the floor"

SO...I'm starting a NEW blog.  SURPRISE!!!  I know, I know...not impressive...yet...give me time.

I've had a personal diary-like blog for a while now.  The people that read that blog in particular are people I know in real life and are either a) nosy b) far away c) bored.  I've fallen off the blogging boat, mostly because on that site I feel like I have to filter what I post both for the sake of my reputation as a mom in this small town, for my kid's well-being, and also for the sake of avoiding confrontation.  SO...this blog is going to be unfiltered and straight up.

What will you find here?  I don't know.  I can tell you what you WILL NOT find here.

You WILL NOT find photo after photo of my kids.
You WILL NOT find lies.
You WILL NOT find a happy-go-lucky place every single day (granted I'm pretty happy-go-lucky so you will have to deal with that reality.)
You WILL NOT find consistency.
You WILL NOT find a filter.

You WILL find me using a LOT OF CAPITAL LETTERS....I just love ALL CAPS...deal with it.
You WILL find me going crazy some days.
You WILL find me being not so politically correct all the time.
You WILL find topics to discuss and perhaps even comment on to teach me a thing or two.

I do not know everything...although I really like for people to think I do.
All I know is I love my children and I am doing everything I can every single day to be the BEST mom I can be to them.

Happy Reading!!